Curly, Snout and Trott

The Piggawig Boys

Once upon a time, there were three brothers. They were all pigs.

Although quite cute when they were piglets, with their tiny trotters and shiny pink noses, they grew up to be boisterous and troublesome. By the time they were teenagers, their dad had reached the end of his tether and told them to go out and make their way in the world.

Curly, the oldest of the Piggawig boys, was thrilled to find a licence to print money when he saw an advertisement in the Careers Office window to train as an Accountant. He reckoned he was good at sums, so he applied. Over the next couple of years, he learned how to screw more out of a job than the effort he put in, passed his exams with mediocre results and joined a local Accountancy Firm. Even though he did not actually produce anything, he was paid £30 thousand a year and considered himself to be very important indeed. His student loan was £55k, but he tried not to think about that.

Snout was the middle brother, and not to be outdone, he enrolled in the local Law School where he enjoyed drinking games and wearing stupidly long scarves. After a few years, he managed to qualify and secured a job with a local Law Firm. He left no pointless letter unwritten or telephone call un-logged in his quest to preserve the tradition of doing very little actual work whilst charging exorbitant fees. Even though he did not produce anything, he was paid £30 thousand a year and considered himself to be very important indeed. His student loan was £55k, but he tried not to think about that.

Trott was the youngest of the three, and he chose an entirely different path. He was curious and wanted to have adventures, so he took what little money his dear old Dad gave him and travelled the world. He worked in bars, olive groves and factories and conversed with monks in Tibet and goat herders in Congo. Everyone he met along the way was happy to teach the eager young Piggawig the wondrous lessons of life. He had very little but did not need much and, as often as not, gathered his food from the sea or hedgerows and slept under a blanket of stars. Of course, he also mixed liberally with the ladies. Oh, the sights he saw and the experiences he had!

But all good things must come to pass, and the time came for him to return home, to settle down and maybe have a piglet family of his own. He looked forward to telling his father and brothers of his amazing adventures. However, when he finally arrived at his father’s house, there was no one there to welcome him. He discovered that his brothers were far too busy being important and had sent their father to a Rest Home for embarrassing old pigs.

Trott was disappointed but not downhearted and decided to find his own place to live and get a proper job. On passing by the local college, he noticed a poster promoting part-time courses in plumbing, so he enrolled. He was good with his trotters and no stranger to hard work, and within a year, much to the amusement of his “professional” brothers, he had a qualification and embarked on his trade with enthusiasm. Despite fierce competition, he quickly built his earnings up to and beyond £30 thousand a year.

He had no student debts or worries, and despite being run off his trotters fixing boilers and leaks, not to mention the demands of his loving partner and their gorgeous piglet, he always found the time to visit his dear old dad at the Rest Home and his brothers at the Rehab Clinic.

The moral of the story is clear: be more Trott.

Linked: Phatsaks and Nobnobbs

Contributory thinking: Aesop
Pictures: From various sources
References: Morals

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